Have you ever caught yourself (or someone else) saying, “Can you believe they did that?”
What about, “I don’t know why they made that decision,” or “It’s not what I would do, but…”
Those kinds of remarks all point to one thing:
There’s a Blamephant in the room.
One of the most common ways to feed a Blamephant in a team is to blame the leader.
That’s because, instead of taking action, we blame other people’s inaction for that barrier.
When we complain instead of acting on problems, we are feeding the Blamephant.
There are, of course, situations when the person with formal authority needs to take action.
However, this does not mean they hold sole responsibility for every team issue.
Leadership is not a role; it’s an act.
Leadership is a skill we can cultivate in ourselves.
When we make a leader the scapegoat for team inaction, we stunt our own potential.
And, we hold back our team from success.
To stop feeding the Blamephant, ask yourself four questions.
- #What would success look like in this situation?
- What haven’t I tried yet?
- What steps could I take to help resolve this situation?
- What do I gain when I feed the Blamephant?
By thinking through these questions, you can interrupt the cycle of blame.
And stop feeding that pesky Blamephant.
For more ways to stop placing undue blame, find Don’t Feed the Elephants! on Amazon.
Sarah Noll Wilson is on a mission to help leaders build and rebuild teams. She aims to empower leaders to understand and honor the beautiful complexity of the humans they serve. Through her work as an Executive Coach, an in-demand Keynote Speaker, Researcher, Contributor to Harvard Business Review, and Bestselling Author of “Don’t Feed the Elephants”, Sarah helps leaders close the gap between what they intend to do and the actual impact they make. She hosts the podcast “Conversations on Conversations”, is certified in Co-Active Coaching and Conversational Intelligence, and is a frequent guest lecturer at universities. In addition to her work with organizations, Sarah is a passionate advocate for mental health.